Thursday, April 25, 2013
Monday, April 22, 2013
Not in Boston!
Growing up,I always wished for a brother closer to my age.
Someone I could go play soccer with,fight with and chase girls with as we grew older.
But with the random nature with which family members are allocated and apparently presidents are chosen for countries,I could have ended up with the short end of the straw like Nigeria has with its president and gotten one of the Tsarnaev brothers as a growing up buddy!
The only difference would obviously be that we'd probably still be having lunch at the closest KFC,sipping on an ice cold fruity slush while watching President Jo on NTA Network telling Nigerians to accept that 'terrorism is a global phenomenom and we should live with it"
Not in America though!
At exactly 1.49a.m Saturday morning,Nigeria time,with the help of Jack Bauer and his team at CTU (don't you go telling me they don't exist,),the siege was over.
One hostage dead,the other captured.
It was a prime example of ridiculously efficient police work.
Prompt response,precise intelligence and effective weaponry;I apologise on behalf of myself and all those who have ever doubted every episode of CSI we've watched;even the rubbish CSI Miami.
By the way,are you one of those who have been kept awake in the last day or so wondering what lessons our dear Nigeria Police Force(less) can learn from the Boston episode?
I'll tell u six simple words.........Move along dear,.no lessons here.
I'm really not a Nigeria basher (I am to be honest) and I don't criticize things simply because they are Nigerian (I really don't) but our crime to resolution ratio must be something like 10000:1;in fact Omotola a.k.a Omosexy(time you changed that name sister,you're no spring chicken)has a better chance of passing off as a credible musician than our police has of solving a crime.
Don't get me wrong,if our police catch you red handed at the scene of a crime,they'll deal with you and fuck you up faster than you can say Amnesty!
But if you,my good readers or possible criminals-in-the-making,commits a crime in this great country of ours on Street A and luckily escape to your house on Street B less than two minutes walk from the crime scene,believe me,before man,God and President Jo's bowler hat,you're as free as a Tontoh Dike C.D!
Pardon me................ but someone just whispered in my ear that people actually pay money for her music!
Hard to believe but apparently true!
The Boston incident clearly demonstrates what a country can achieve with a strong and determined leadership.
When President Obama gave the speech in Boston the day before the Tsarnaevs were apprehended,pride welled in me as I saw a fellow black man rise up to the challenge.
His battle cry "Not in Boston" still rings in my ear as I recall another fellow black man telling me to "learn to live with terrorism because it is a global phenomenon".
Anyway,is it just me or the folks on CNN really need to get a life!
Bad news is obviously good news for business!
Such is life!
Someone I could go play soccer with,fight with and chase girls with as we grew older.
But with the random nature with which family members are allocated and apparently presidents are chosen for countries,I could have ended up with the short end of the straw like Nigeria has with its president and gotten one of the Tsarnaev brothers as a growing up buddy!
The only difference would obviously be that we'd probably still be having lunch at the closest KFC,sipping on an ice cold fruity slush while watching President Jo on NTA Network telling Nigerians to accept that 'terrorism is a global phenomenom and we should live with it"
Not in America though!
At exactly 1.49a.m Saturday morning,Nigeria time,with the help of Jack Bauer and his team at CTU (don't you go telling me they don't exist,),the siege was over.
 |
| Jack Bauer briefing President Obama. |
One hostage dead,the other captured.
It was a prime example of ridiculously efficient police work.
Prompt response,precise intelligence and effective weaponry;I apologise on behalf of myself and all those who have ever doubted every episode of CSI we've watched;even the rubbish CSI Miami.
By the way,are you one of those who have been kept awake in the last day or so wondering what lessons our dear Nigeria Police Force(less) can learn from the Boston episode?
I'll tell u six simple words.........Move along dear,.no lessons here.
I'm really not a Nigeria basher (I am to be honest) and I don't criticize things simply because they are Nigerian (I really don't) but our crime to resolution ratio must be something like 10000:1;in fact Omotola a.k.a Omosexy(time you changed that name sister,you're no spring chicken)has a better chance of passing off as a credible musician than our police has of solving a crime.
 |
| And we wonder why????????? |
Don't get me wrong,if our police catch you red handed at the scene of a crime,they'll deal with you and fuck you up faster than you can say Amnesty!
But if you,my good readers or possible criminals-in-the-making,commits a crime in this great country of ours on Street A and luckily escape to your house on Street B less than two minutes walk from the crime scene,believe me,before man,God and President Jo's bowler hat,you're as free as a Tontoh Dike C.D!
Pardon me................ but someone just whispered in my ear that people actually pay money for her music!
Hard to believe but apparently true!
The Boston incident clearly demonstrates what a country can achieve with a strong and determined leadership.
When President Obama gave the speech in Boston the day before the Tsarnaevs were apprehended,pride welled in me as I saw a fellow black man rise up to the challenge.
His battle cry "Not in Boston" still rings in my ear as I recall another fellow black man telling me to "learn to live with terrorism because it is a global phenomenon".
Anyway,is it just me or the folks on CNN really need to get a life!
Bad news is obviously good news for business!
Such is life!
Saturday, April 13, 2013
Countries of P.A.I.N!
Like every good and hardworking gossip knows,bad news travels faster than an Arik jet;would have loved to say Aero;but you know how they are these days,flight delays,cancellations,..........I love you guys at Aero but we don't really want bad news getting stranded now,do we?
Anyhoo,I'm guessing it did not take Ted Turner,founder and previous CEO of CNN,too long to figure out that simple logic.
Growing up,the news always seemed to be centred around countries like Somalia,Ethiopia,the USSR and Czechoslovakia(little wonder the country split!Must have been a pain in the ass and then some,filling your nationality on a visa application).
And this went on for a while!
But as development and peace came to these countries,they got mentioned less.
These days,when the striking blonde bombshell of a newscaster starts the day's headlines with lines like "A bomb went off in a crowded market killing 48 people" or "Cholera spreads through a remote village taking with it 400 lives" or "Politician builds multi-billion currency church or mosque in his village",you can quietly take an educated or a not so educated guess(if you attended any of these private universities with 6 classrooms and a dining hall) as to which countries this might have happened.
I call them the countries of PAIN;Pakistan.Afghanistan,Iraq and Nigeria.
These countries seem to have taken the art of inflicting the greatest amount of suffering on their citizens to another level!
I can only guess that they their leaders have an Annual General Meeting of sorts,where they meet,network and exchange ideas on what's new in "Suffering the masses".
I can imagine a certain bowler hat wearing president in attendance,muttering to himself silently in a corner,wondering why he has not been elected chairman of this group.
"Has anyone of them done more to inflict pain on his own people?
"Ehn?"
"Do they have more unemployed people roaming on unpaved streets as I do?"
"Can any of them boast of having more uneducated and undereducated youth,with university degrees worth less than a Kim Kardashian tweet?"
It baffles me to no end how Nigeria got mixed up with this unwholesome bunch!
How did Nigeria turn from a country aptly dubbed the Giant of Africa,with unbelievable human and mineral resources and boundless potential to playmates of such a vile group?;then again,how did Tiger Woods plummet from an adored spoting hero to the whore mongering delinquent that he is viewed as today?
Some things we'll never understand!
I just pray that in the next 50 years,we will have developed the magic formula to steady supply of electricity,so that our grandkids can eventually develop our economy.
That in 50 years,we will have evolved to understand that bombs don't advance causes.
And that in 50years,most importantly,we will have eventually come to the conclusion that bowler hats went out of fashion at least a 100 years prior!
P.S:"9 health workers shot during a vaccination drive in a remote village in............." You can put any country of the 4,you wouldn't be far from the correct one.
 |
| AERO CONTRACTOR.........'We'll get there when we can!' |
Anyhoo,I'm guessing it did not take Ted Turner,founder and previous CEO of CNN,too long to figure out that simple logic.
Growing up,the news always seemed to be centred around countries like Somalia,Ethiopia,the USSR and Czechoslovakia(little wonder the country split!Must have been a pain in the ass and then some,filling your nationality on a visa application).
And this went on for a while!
But as development and peace came to these countries,they got mentioned less.
These days,when the striking blonde bombshell of a newscaster starts the day's headlines with lines like "A bomb went off in a crowded market killing 48 people" or "Cholera spreads through a remote village taking with it 400 lives" or "Politician builds multi-billion currency church or mosque in his village",you can quietly take an educated or a not so educated guess(if you attended any of these private universities with 6 classrooms and a dining hall) as to which countries this might have happened.
I call them the countries of PAIN;Pakistan.Afghanistan,Iraq and Nigeria.
These countries seem to have taken the art of inflicting the greatest amount of suffering on their citizens to another level!
I can only guess that they their leaders have an Annual General Meeting of sorts,where they meet,network and exchange ideas on what's new in "Suffering the masses".
I can imagine a certain bowler hat wearing president in attendance,muttering to himself silently in a corner,wondering why he has not been elected chairman of this group.
"Has anyone of them done more to inflict pain on his own people?
"Ehn?"
"Do they have more unemployed people roaming on unpaved streets as I do?"
"Can any of them boast of having more uneducated and undereducated youth,with university degrees worth less than a Kim Kardashian tweet?"
It baffles me to no end how Nigeria got mixed up with this unwholesome bunch!
How did Nigeria turn from a country aptly dubbed the Giant of Africa,with unbelievable human and mineral resources and boundless potential to playmates of such a vile group?;then again,how did Tiger Woods plummet from an adored spoting hero to the whore mongering delinquent that he is viewed as today?
Some things we'll never understand!
I just pray that in the next 50 years,we will have developed the magic formula to steady supply of electricity,so that our grandkids can eventually develop our economy.
That in 50 years,we will have evolved to understand that bombs don't advance causes.
And that in 50years,most importantly,we will have eventually come to the conclusion that bowler hats went out of fashion at least a 100 years prior!
 |
| Sir Edward Whats-His-Name.Voted most dapper gentleman in1802. |
P.S:"9 health workers shot during a vaccination drive in a remote village in............." You can put any country of the 4,you wouldn't be far from the correct one.
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